Betrayed, tyvm friend [#2] // You can have your friendship back.

I'm full of so many emotions currently that I can't even think clearly and type correctly, so I'll just post this poem I wrote before like, 5 minutes...I hope the person it's about reads it and understands me at least for once ;) Yes, this is really what I want - what it says in the poem.

You can have your friendship back

You know, you didn't have to blame me, it wasn't my fault that he died-
but it was your fault that before a few weeks I cried.
You just said you weren't in the mood to talk,
I didn't really know how to answer so just aside I started to walk.
Kind of hurts to see you talking with your new best friend and boyfriend
while you said you were just too depressed to talk with anyone, that you wanted it to end.
Your ignorance was anything but wishful bliss,
actually it was far from that, just made me fall into a deep abyss.
So I asked you what the eff was wrong,
you said nothing, you said you were just trying to act strong.
Well guess what, I don't think being strong includes smashing somebody to pieces
that can never again be mended as life decreases.
I didn't expect that you'd say I was annoying,
I was hurt but I tried not showing.
So I just turned my mouth upwards in a smile
and I actually whispered "Once in a while...".
The ignorance only continued, day by day it got worse,
I felt like I was drowning, like it was some kind of curse.
Not that you'd know, you felt happy with all of your other friends,
you didn't care about how this long friendship ends.
After a few days I gave up, I said "f*** this",
you know, all of the fun times that we had I really do miss
but I can't go on like this forever, my heart isn't some kind of toy
with which you can play it and give yourself pleasure and joy
by seeing a little bit pain in my eyes,
by ignoring for help my silent cries.
You tried to talk, but it just hurt too much,
my eyes would start to water, my heart would turn in a knot and such~,
so I told you the truth, that I didn't anymore care
since after all, you were the one that thought that the awesome times we share
are meaningless, are a one big nothing that nobody cares about.
Well guess what, now I'll just scream and shout
that I cared, that I want things back to normal, the way it used to be!
But oh well, that can't happen, no more friendship between You and Me.
Since two months ago, the same thing happened, but I gave you a second chance,
and you know what, when back I make a glance,
I do recall saying that it was the last one I was giving you.
I never lie, what I say is always true,
so take this as my last goodbye to you and to your friends.
You can even tell him how our friendship ends,
you can start talking behind my back again
as I just watch after you, soaking wet from the rain.
Your friends were once mine, but they set me on fire and watched me burn,
ironic how you said you'd never do that to me but they let you have a turn
in causing me pain and sorrow that you've never ever felt before.
But anywho, I'm pretty sure you don't wanna hear how my heart feels sore
and how sometimes it's so tempting to talk to you when you try to talk to me,
but I can't because I'm such a smartass and I can't let this anymore be.
It's kinda hard to say that I miss you and I want it back
but I won't say it, since you turned my world grey and black.

Last farewell, last goodbye,
for our friendship back this is my final cry.
No more chances, no more turning back,
I don't care that so many skills I lack.
This is the end of my sorrow, hopefully.
All of the emotions deep in me
were just released. And lastly...
one last "I'm sorry" if I ever did something wrong.

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