Author Message

jshellshear

Rank 3
Joined
02 Feb 2008
Posts
1335
Location
United States
PostedSep 24, 2008 9:29 pm

Extreme emotions

Extreme Anger, Extreme Sadness. Don't suffer, please talk to someone.
I ran across a thread today that's disturbed me. Mostly because I do not know how true it is or is not. But it got me thinking.

This is a game, but the people who play this game are real people. Real people living somewhere, sat in front of a computer, talking, chatting, sharing their lives, their hopes, their fears, their problems, and their successes.

We've all seen people congratulate each other on birthdays, on weddings, on the birth of children, but sharing real life problems, may not be something that anyone is used to, or accustomed to...

And it's that, that I would like to focus on for just a moment.

Let me be clear. This topic is for people who have issues, and are feeling stress and pressure, and are not sure what to do about it. To those people who feel that no one cares, or that no one is interested in what you say or do, or that no one cares about the problems and pressures you are feeling... Please be aware, you are not alone.

This is a community of people who like to play a game, but they are real people, and those real people care about one another, and they'll listen if you have something to say. All you have to do, is speak up and let them hear you, because Suicide is never an answer.

The best thing anyone reading can do if they feel that kind of pressure, is to find someone to talk to, and let it out. And if you do not feel like talking to any friends you may have, or that you can't trust anyone with the way you feel... Then talk to someone else. But please whatever you do, talk to someone, and let them know how you feel, because there are people that care.

Let me give you some examples.

http://www.hopeline.com/ You can also call them: 1800-784-2433

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ You can call them too: 1-800-273-TALK (8255)

http://www.suicide.org/teen-suicide-and-youth-suicide.html

You can also call: (1-800-999-9999) or your local emergency number (911).

All of these numbers are toll-free lines which means the call is free, they are staffed 24 hours a day, 7 days a week by trained professionals who can help you without ever knowing your name or seeing your face. All calls are confidential ó no one you know will find out that you've called. They are there to help you figure out how to work through tough situations and they are there to listen to you, and talk to you. They can help you, and more importantly, they WANT to help you.

You are not alone, and if you understand nothing else from this topic, please understand that. Suicide is not the answer, give yourself a little time and everything can change.

Just take a little time, to breathe, and think it over, and call someone.
Advertisement

huitzilhuitl

Rank 4
Joined
06 Nov 2007
Posts
2069
Location
Chuco town United States
PostedSep 24, 2008 9:46 pm
What thread did you cross to have to post this? Shocked Shocked Shocked Meh, Well if anyone has trouble they can pm me ingame and we can talk. Razz Nice post logic.

"Every person is a book with thousands of pages and on each lies an irreparable truth."

Toxicwench

Rank 3
Toxicwench
Joined
30 Jan 2008
Posts
1366
Location
Bristol, Tennessee United States
PostedSep 24, 2008 11:10 pm
Suicide talk is never to be taken lightly, Logic. You are right. I don't know which thread you are referring to.. but I will provide some information and a link from my favorite sites about it. Have sent several patients there and it helped them.

 
if you are thinking about
suicide... read this first

If you are feeling suicidal now, please stop long enough to read this. It will only take about five minutes. I do not want to talk you out of your bad feelings. I am not a therapist or other mental health professional - only someone who knows what it is like to be in pain.

I donít know who you are, or why you are reading this page. I only know that for the moment, youíre reading it, and that is good. I can assume that you are here because you are troubled and considering ending your life. If it were possible, I would prefer to be there with you at this moment, to sit with you and talk, face to face and heart to heart. But since that is not possible, we will have to make do with this.

I have known a lot of people who have wanted to kill themselves, so I have some small idea of what you might be feeling. I know that you might not be up to reading a long book, so I am going to keep this short. While we are together here for the next five minutes, I have five simple, practical things I would like to share with you. I wonít argue with you about whether you should kill yourself. But I assume that if you are thinking about it, you feel pretty bad.

Well, youíre still reading, and thatís very good. Iíd like to ask you to stay with me for the rest of this page. I hope it means that youíre at least a tiny bit unsure, somewhere deep inside, about whether or not you really will end your life. Often people feel that, even in the deepest darkness of despair. Being unsure about dying is okay and normal. The fact that you are still alive at this minute means you are still a little bit unsure. It means that even while you want to die, at the same time some part of you still wants to live. So letís hang on to that, and keep going for a few more minutes.

Start by considering this statement:

ďSuicide is not chosen; it happens
when pain exceeds
resources for coping with pain.Ē

Thatís all itís about. You are not a bad person, or crazy, or weak, or flawed, because you feel suicidal. It doesnít even mean that you really want to die - it only means that you have more pain than you can cope with right now. If I start piling weights on your shoulders, you will eventually collapse if I add enough weights... no matter how much you want to remain standing. Willpower has nothing to do with it. Of course you would cheer yourself up, if you could.

Donít accept it if someone tells you, ďthatís not enough to be suicidal about.Ē There are many kinds of pain that may lead to suicide. Whether or not the pain is bearable may differ from person to person. What might be bearable to someone else, may not be bearable to you. The point at which the pain becomes unbearable depends on what kinds of coping resources you have. Individuals vary greatly in their capacity to withstand pain.

When pain exceeds pain-coping resources, suicidal feelings are the result. Suicide is neither wrong nor right; it is not a defect of character; it is morally neutral. It is simply an imbalance of pain versus coping resources.

You can survive suicidal feelings if you do either of two things: (1) find a way to reduce your pain, or (2) find a way to increase your coping resources. Both are possible.

Now I want to tell you five things to think about.

1

You need to hear that people do get through this -- even people who feel as badly as you are feeling now. Statistically, there is a very good chance that you are going to live. I hope that this information gives you some sense of hope.
2

Give yourself some distance. Say to yourself, ďI will wait 24 hours before I do anything.Ē Or a week. Remember that feelings and actions are two different things - just because you feel like killing yourself, doesnít mean that you have to actually do it right this minute. Put some distance between your suicidal feelings and suicidal action. Even if itís just 24 hours. You have already done it for 5 minutes, just by reading this page. You can do it for another 5 minutes by continuing to read this page. Keep going, and realize that while you still feel suicidal, you are not, at this moment, acting on it. That is very encouraging to me, and I hope it is to you.
3

People often turn to suicide because they are seeking relief from pain. Remember that relief is a feeling. And you have to be alive to feel it. You will not feel the relief you so desperately seek, if you are dead.
4

Some people will react badly to your suicidal feelings, either because they are frightened, or angry; they may actually increase your pain instead of helping you, despite their intentions, by saying or doing thoughtless things. You have to understand that their bad reactions are about their fears, not about you.

But there are people out there who can be with you in this horrible time, and will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital, or try to talk you out of how badly you feel. They will simply care for you. Find one of them. Now. Use your 24 hours, or your week, and tell someone whatís going on with you. It is okay to ask for help. Try:

* Send an anonymous e-mail to The Samaritans
* Call 1-800-SUICIDE in the U.S.
* Teenagers, call Covenant House NineLine, 1-800-999-9999
* Look in the front of your phone book for a crisis line
* Call a psychotherapist
* Carefully choose a friend or a minister or rabbi, someone who is likely to listen

But donít give yourself the additional burden of trying to deal with this alone. Just talking about how you got to where you are, releases an awful lot of the pressure, and it might be just the additional coping resource you need to regain your balance.
5

Suicidal feelings are, in and of themselves, traumatic. After they subside, you need to continue caring for yourself. Therapy is a really good idea. So are the various self-help groups available both in your community and on the Internet.

Well, itís been a few minutes and youíre still with me. Iím really glad.

Since you have made it this far, you deserve a reward. I think you should reward yourself by giving yourself a gift. The gift you will give yourself is a coping resource. Remember, back up near the top of the page, I said that the idea is to make sure you have more coping resources than you have pain. So letís give you another coping resource, or two, or ten...! until they outnumber your sources of pain.

Now, while this page may have given you some small relief, the best coping resource we can give you is another human being to talk with. If you find someone who wants to listen, and tell them how you are feeling and how you got to this point, you will have increased your coping resources by one. Hopefully the first person you choose wonít be the last. There are a lot of people out there who really want to hear from you. Itís time to start looking around for one of them.

Now: Iíd like you to call someone.

And while youíre at it, you can still stay with me for a bit. Check out these sources of online help.

Additional things to read at this site:

*

How serious is our condition? ...ďhe only took 15 pills, he wasnít really serious...Ē if others are making you feel like youíre just trying to get attention... read this.
*

Why is it so hard for us to recover from being suicidal? ...while most suicidal people recover and go on, others struggle with suicidal thoughts and feelings for months or even years. Suicide and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
*

Recovery from grief and loss ...has anyone significant in your life recently died? You would be in good company... many suicidal people have recently suffered a loss.
*

The stigma of suicide that prevents suicidal people from recovering: we are not only fighting our own pain, but the pain that others inflict on us... and that we ourselves add to. Stigma is a huge complicating factor in suicidal feelings.
*

Resources about depression ...if you are suicidal, you are most likely experiencing some form of depression. This is good news, because depression can be treated, helping you feel better.

Do you know someone who is suicidal... or would you like to be able to help, if the situation arises? Learn what to do, so that you can make the situation better, not worse.

*

Handling a call from a suicidal person ...a very helpful ten-point list that you can print out and keep near your phone or computer.
*

What can I do to help someone who may be suicidal? ...a helpful guide, includes Suicide Warning Signs.

Other online sources of help:

*

The Samaritans - trained volunteers are available 24 hours a day to listen and provide emotional support. You can call a volunteer on the phone, or e-mail them. Confidential and non-judgmental. Short of writing to a psychotherapist, the best source of online help.
*

Talk to a therapist online - Read this page to find out how.
*

Depression support group online: Walkers in Darkness - Please note: this is a very big group, but amidst all the chatter (and occasional bickering), it is possible to find someone who will hear you and offer support.
*

Psych Central has a good listing of online resources for suicide and other mental health needs.
*

Still feel bad? These jokes might relieve the pressure for a minute or two.
*

If you want help finding a human being to talk with in person, who can help you live through this, try reading this article about how to Choose a Competent Counselor.

Sometimes people need additional private help before they are ready to talk with someone in person. Here are three books you could read on your own in private. I know from personal experience that each one has helped someone like you.

*

Suicide: The Forever Decision by Paul G. Quinnett, PhD (Continuum, 1989, $8.95, ISBN 0-8264-0391-3). Frank and helpful conversation with a therapist who cares. Order the book
*

Choosing to Live: how to defeat suicide through cognitive therapy by Thomas E. Ellis PsyD and Cory F. Newman PhD (New Harbinger Publications, 1996, $12.95, ISBN 1-57224-056-3). Another conversational book with practical help for suicidal persons. Order the book
*

How I Stayed Alive When My Brain Was Trying to Kill Me: One Person's Guide to Suicide Prevention by Susan Rose Blauner (William Morrow, 2002, $17.47, ISBN 0066211212). A very practical survival guide by an actual survivor. Order the book
 
http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

[AGM]Syndicate G1

Urmel666

Rank 1
Urmel666
Joined
19 Feb 2008
Posts
205
Location
Cologne Germany
PostedSep 25, 2008 5:11 am
I saw the thread too.... made me feel bad =/
still dont know if I should believe it or not....

for european players: send me a pm and I will give you some links to helpful sides / telephone numbers

Lacour - Lvl 107 - Fujin Devo - Guild: Myth - retired Ethanar - M x - Guan Vengeance - Guild: Myth ([Brigade Leader])

GMValkyrie

Aeria: Specialist
GMValkyrie
Joined
14 Mar 2008
Posts
1497
Location
San Jose United States
PostedSep 25, 2008 5:50 pm
This thread can be of great help to those feeling stress, not even necessarily those that feel so to the point of suicide.

I'm locking this, moving it where it can be referenced for all games, and stickying it.
Specific instances should not have been brought to this thread.

Display posts from previous:   Sort by: